How Men & Women Misunderstand Sex

How Men & Women Misunderstand Sex

“Let’s talk about Sex baby, let’s talk about you and me, let’s talk all the good things and the bad that maybe, let’s talk about Sex...”

The popular Salt-N-Pepa song certified Gold and peaked at #13 at the Billboard Hot 100 chart.

Why was this song a hit and so popular? It got people talking, giving people an opening to have that safe & open conversation. A conversation where you get to share your fantasies, dreams and the sexual bucket list you would like to explore.

Misunderstanding or Misconceptions?

Misunderstandings happen when you do not fully engaged in a conversation, half-listening and not asking for more details and clarity, whereas misconceptions are based only listening to what you want out of the experience, or only hearing what you want to hear and taking your already existing beliefs, bullshit and past hurts into that sexual act.

Here’s a concept… Be open and curious! I say this with a bite as it enrages me how much and how many boundaries and conditions we put on our sexual partner or partners. I’m all for monogany, however you cannot except monogany with someone you are just having sex with, and having exclusive relationships can not eventuate BEFORE you’ve had the discussion or the conversation about what you want. Again people perceptions are blurred, instead of being curious, asked yourself and your Lover what you would like out of the experience.

No attachments with Open-Hearted Conversation

I laugh at this phrase, it’s sounds like a oxymoron right? You can still have an
open-hearted conversation with no attachments, to easily understand the concept is no attachment to the outcome. People read ‘into what they want’, rather than be at peace with the situation how it is, and showing gratitude for what you have.

Your Negotiable & Non-Negotiables

You do not know what you do not know. Meaning when we put limitations on what we would like in the relationship, it is based on what you know right now… For example; when you meet a possible business connection, you go to the meeting with YOUR intention and a rough idea what the person has in mind, however unless you asked that person outright you do not have a clear vision of what you can create together. The exact same in a relationship weather it be emotional, sexual and or spiritual. You will never know to what extent you can go unless you give it a go and are prepared to be open.

Understanding Your Body

Here’s a little information for you so you can understand how your body reacts when having sex regardless if you orgasm. For example Oxytocin can be released when cuddling and kissing, depending on the intensity you experience you can have a all over body orgasm… I know how hot is that!

Vascular System
The system that carries or circulate fluids such as blood or lymph through the body

Nervous System
The nervous system helps all the parts of the body to communicate with each other. It also reacts to changes both outside and inside the body. The nervous system uses both electrical and chemical means to send and received messages. The brain and spinal cord make up the central nervous system. Nerves everywhere else in the body are part of the peripheral nervous system.

Endocrine System
The Endocrine is a system of glands, each of which secrets a type of hormone directly into the bloodstream to regulate the body. Hormones regulate various human functions, including metabolism, growth and development, tissue function, and mood.

Class-A Natural Drugs
Testosterone: Fuels sexual drive & aggression. It is essential to libido and sexual arousal in men and women

Sex Pheromone: “Come to me” chemical (scents) that is secreted in mammals.

Adrenaline (known as Epinephrine): Activates the sympathetic nervous systems, which increases your heart rate and dilates arteries to increase blood flow to your muscles during sex, Feelings of exhilaration!

Phenyl ethylamine: Triggers the release of dopamine in the pleasure centers of the brain. Released during sex and peaks at orgasm, which give an overwhelming feeling of bliss, attraction and excitement.

Dopamine: Neurotransmitter that stimulates ‘’desire and reward’ by triggering an intense rush of pleasure

Oxytocin (cuddling hormone): Secreted by the pituitary gland, it stimulates the prostrate, causes contractions and sensitizes nerves.

After Effects
Endorphins: Group of neurotransmitters formed within the bodies that bind to opiate receptor sites in your brain to naturally relieve pain. Produce feelings of euphoria, pleasure and calming effect.

Serotonin: Regulates your mood. You feel cheerful, hopeful, emotionally balanced, and content.

Prolactin: Relieves sexual arousal after orgasm and takes your mind off sex.

Vasopressin: Pair-bonding chemical. The structure of oxytocin is very similar to that of the vasopressins.

So how could you misunderstand Sex?

Nowadays self-gratification and rampant sexual encounters seem to be the ‘IN” thing. Totally different from my Ma & Pa’s generation, granted they still got their rocks off and still experienced ‘free love’ the difference was you were wither a closet lover or a hippie and into free love. That’s the point of this Blog to be clear and concise with what you want to experience. Chose to either f*@k hard, or make Love or both, regardless make a decision without any attachments. You will know when it’s time to ‘have the conversation’, until then be okay with enjoying and being in the moment.

Here’s to Love & abundance.

Comments ( 2 )

  • Denver

    If only there were more cleevr people like you!

    • We are all clever, the answers are always within ourselves when we take the time to listen.

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